Discussion of the Day
Dumping people
Zing10-Oct-21
I read on a news site that one of the most common reasons for dumping a partner is due to their finances.... or lack of!
So basically...some people will get dumped if they don't measure up to their partners expectations in regard to money.
Men are at most risk according to studies done.
This does not surprise me!
Do you consider this to be unfair, and very shallow way to treat someone, because they don't have much money in the bank?
Comments
  • john v 551148
    will giving her good head help keep me around if low on funds?
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    • Carolyn7 P
      Actually my Husband was $23,000 in debt when we started dating. So, I called all his debtors and made payment arrangements and paid them all off before we got married. I cared more not to marry debt than if he was rich. What you are talking about is marrying for money which I guess make some people happy, but love has made me happy for many years now. I still try to win the lottery though!
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      • Katzeye
        My mum must of been very shallow then lol because she married 5 times lol...oddly none of them were rich.
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        • Louisa W
          I have been dumped many times but i have not dumped anyone. So who knows why they do it.
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          • Rose S 88496
            If you truely love someone money is the last thing you care about don’t get me wrong nice to have but not a primary concern
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            • Mariaj
              True love has nothing to do with money or any material possessions..! So yes that is indeed very shallow and not worthy of love
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              • Jan M 586967
                Money helps but should not be a controlling factor in a relationship
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                • judy W 15921
                  It's so sad people just see $$$ and not see past this, I'm so glad I grew up in the 50s and 60s and was taught morals and to share, I still do it today but unfortunately everyone is too busy with their own interests to even worry about another person
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                  • JANET R 328390
                    Absolutely shallow I say. I actually call them USERS. Real love has nothing to do with money................ It is ABOUT BEING WITH SOMEONE - NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS when it comes to money.........................
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                    • Leslie D 488751
                      People today are so shallow that money comes first in everything. If that was the case then good riddance to them. If the lack of money was the real reason for them to leave a relationship, then why did they get together in the first place? I know for a fact that for most women the first question they ask a man first is...How much money do you have? Then they ask, What type of car do you have? Then something more personal that most men fear. These women are so shallow and deserve the flick anyway. I wouldn't give these women the time of day.
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                      • Imperia S
                        I do like hearing that a person gets dumped for money reasons, if I was to dump someone it would be to how I am being treated, eg Violence
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                        • JANET R 328390
                          TOTALLY AGREE..................
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                      • mary c
                        Wow- never ended a relationship for that reason. Never ended a relationship for the reasons i should have though. I guess if you are a very money oriented person and want an expensive lifestyle and your partner is the opposite it wouldn't bode well in the long run. I would always want to be with someone who could equally help pay the bills. But as we know- things can turn to crap and that can ends up not the case.
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                        • Zoe 416073
                          Depends on the countries maternity leave laws. As a woman you are then way more dependent on your husband. So he better know how to care for his family financially. Where society is stronger you can allow yourself to be less materialistic
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                          • Mooi
                            I have been with the same partner since 1977. We have gone through some bad financial times and yes it puts a huge stress on your relationship. The worry about how you are going to manage especially when you have a family, but to dump some now whether it be male or female because of hardship financially which is most probably caused by both parties is just shallow, short sighted and selfish.
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                            • Colleen M 510798
                              I have never dated someone because of their money. Or lack thereof. I feel it's important for a person to be able to stand on their own without a partner that way if something does happen then you can still deal with whatever happens. With all that said, I like for the person I am with to have motivations and goals in their life and not just be a lazy ass punk. They don't have to have the same likes as I do in all things because I like to do my own thing, but it is nice to share similar goals and likes because it does make things easier and just better in general. It does seem like a lot of people seem to base relationships on money and to me, money isn't everything. I don't need the latest car and the largest house. W all need money to live, but I don't need all the riches of the world to be happy.
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                              • Judy T 470524
                                It's just nature. A woman wants to make sure her children are safe & cared for so a lot of the time she will choose a partner that can provide for her..... yeah it is shallow.
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                                • Edith v
                                  Yes I do .They never cared for that person anyway .The man I met 61yrs ago(and married 59yrs ago)didn't even have a job & was using his savings to pay board & lodgings.He was kind & caring & we did things that didn't cost money.He did eventually find work & we have moved forward .We raised 2 children on a tight budget .We went into business & were successful.We have retired as $millionaires.However money was not that important we were always millionaires with much love & laughter
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                                  • Alex H 487498
                                    yeah it's not a nice thing to happen
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                                    • Dada WA
                                      Why Do People Break Up? (Common and Unexpected Reasons) Having different views and opinions on certain things.People break up when they don't feel heard, seen, respected, or loved.Lack of communication.Growing apart.Serious trust issues.One doesn't love the other enough.Lack of healthy self-esteem.
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                                      • Dada WA
                                        seen this online and copied. Nothing about money.
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                                      • Dada WADada WA
                                        Sounds like the writer of that news article had an axe to grind and put their position to good use.
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                                    • NIkki C 592380
                                      My partner and i keep our finances separate. We met later in life and have accumulated different amounts of “wealth” . We also have children from other relationships. Anyway, getting back to the topic although i have more, it certainly doesn’t mean im more worthy but it can be … annoying when he cant afford things. And before you say “why don’t you shout him” im not meaning going out to dinner. I mean investments, renovating, bid ticket items .
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                                      • Michelle S 553303
                                        That's one of the BIG reasons I haven't been in a relationship for 18 years. I actually don't have much now but I will within the next few years. I couldn't handle the angst that comes with relationships these days! I'm 56 but my 33 year old son has been dating a woman 5 years younger than me for over 4 years now. They have never lived together over this period because she's very wealthy due to her father passing away and she inherited 2 million dollars from him and she also owned her own Real Estate Agency for years in a very nice area which she sold 2 years ago for another pretty penny! She has 2 sons in their 20's and although my son stays with her and visa versa, they ALWAYS remain apart for the number of days which are legally required per year to PROVE that they haven't "co habited" together. I believe that they both love each other very much but I COMPLETELY understand that she doesn't want to put her or her sons wealth at risk. There's WAY too many sad stories out there!
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                                    • Jacqueline R 353303
                                      There will always be "gold diggers" out there. Money isn't the end all to everything, but it does help one live especially these times when people are loosing their jobs.
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                                      • Greg B 520364
                                        She still has not dumped me we were poor 55 years ago and we are still not rich in money
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                                        • Wendy Q
                                          Fairy Nuff, who wants a poor dude
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                                          • GRAEME W 313058
                                            Just look at the bimbo's who chase sports stars because of the money they earn!!
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                                            • Bill H 487635
                                              Then you will have no mates
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                                              • Melinda B 311794
                                                People are not disposable, like a used tissue to be thrown in the bin. Having this 'disposable people' attitude is what is wrong with the world, in my opinion. I barely have enough to support myself. I can't support anyone else, and I ain't anybody else's free ride or cash cow <3
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                                                • Paul J 94868
                                                  Pretty mercenary...
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                                                  • Jenny L 591463
                                                    Wow that is horrible. My husband and I had about the same amount of money. We don't go out, we are home mostly. I think if a person is asking about money from the beginning I would be very concerned and get out as quickly as possible. Run for the hills. Money does not make you happy. My neighbour when I was younger committed suicide and he had money so that just goes to show money isn't every thing.
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                                                    • Belle S
                                                      I have been in relationships with guys who have had, no money, no job, no licence & no car...I think it's safe to say I'm definitely not money hungry or shallow.
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                                                      • Leonie N 638126
                                                        That is awful, I have never dumped anyone because they don't earn enough money.
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                                                        • Debbie C 147795
                                                          Disgraceful who would want to live with somebody like that and their family you would be a nervous wreck trying to make them happy
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                                                          • doug m 408074
                                                            Yep! Shallow indeed but that says something about the "dumper"
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                                                            • Mary M 329762
                                                              A person want to get out of a relationship will find away. My sister husband run away 4 time my sister alway take him back. She buy 3 cars and now want a house she will give in. If a person want to go they will or milk a person will.
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                                                              • Nanbea Aus
                                                                In my opinion people are attracted to others by their personality and not the bank account balance. If you are that shallow that money matters more then good luck with being lonely!
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                                                                • Sonya F 68771
                                                                  When I met my husband he was dead broke and we worked through it we been together for 38 years thick and thin
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                                                                  • Mary M 329762
                                                                    My husband didn't have money and married him. He became better income them me
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                                                                • 'smee,SWQ!
                                                                  I never thought it would come to this but perhaps everyone needs a "Pre-Nuptual Agreement" as part of their Wedding Ceremony now!?
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                                                                  • Mary M 329762
                                                                    I agree but by law its just 5 years them needed a new one
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                                                                • Joe B 288252
                                                                  If a relationship fails just over bank balances then it prolly was a false relationship to start with. It’s usually a symptom of a deeper problem and just sometimes it’s better to end a relationship
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                                                                  • Christine M 323842
                                                                    Have any of you heard of STDs? Sexually Transmitted Debt! And it usually happens to women.
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                                                                    • Robert T 597718
                                                                      Yes Zing most unfair money cannot buy love but a mere pretense and words without a soul yes
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                                                                      • Mary M 329762
                                                                        I find that watch old friend
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                                                                    • Shaffycat
                                                                      mine was not a lack of finances but due to gambling of the finances It destroys relationships and marriages not matter how much you try not to let it
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                                                                      • Phyrephly
                                                                        have a friend who was lonely, (M/age male), so he went to a speed dating meeting: Said that he encountered several women who all had mental lists of questions to fire at him at their "turn" with him: questions were, basically as follows, (in no particular order), - do you have any - serious health problems? children? what age? divorced or widowed? life insurance? retired? and the like, type questions. He was flabbergasted, and felt, as he later said, as if he'd just been through a "... virtual financial proctologist exam". So yeah, I think unfortuntely, money, or more specifically, a lack thereof, has quite alot to do with dumping people, these days.
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                                                                        • Sinalei W
                                                                          Yes
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                                                                          • Maria B 89860
                                                                            What's money got to do with it? Ooops that line is already spoken for, I I believe by Tina Turner, I think those words explain a lot for a lot of us! Speaking for myself I learnt to juggle the finances not hold my hand out for more, but then I was a great contributor as well .... so it must have been others or greener pasture who did the dastardly deed which lead to the dumped experience.
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                                                                            • JANN R
                                                                              It's pretty poor
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                                                                              • John b 479999
                                                                                Yes.pretty shallow.
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                                                                                • Christina C 466456
                                                                                  It depends. There's a few scenarios - a partner who doesn't care about how hard you work or a partner that cares too much about your work. Both are draining and I think most people look for someone who is financially aligned as it makes team work much easier. A lot of people fit somewhere in the middle of those two scenarios as I'd like to think the majority of us want a healthy relationship? It's the extreme cases that make the biggest ruckus.
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                                                                                  • Christine M 323842
                                                                                    It’s not about how much money is in the bank, it’s if the other person is a financial, and then inevitably, an emotional burden. People have different financial attitudes.If you are with someone who believes in working little yet spending large, and you are a save for retirement person, it’s going to cause conflict. Or being with some who is chronically unemployed, yet you are working your arse off (been there!), leads to a power imbalance in the relationship. I believe that everyone keeps their money/bank accounts separate, and you leave a relationship with only your own financial assets.
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                                                                                    • kristian s 513441
                                                                                      I had dump a lot of people in the past based on not being honest with me.
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                                                                                      • Chosen
                                                                                        Money isn't everything but its a long way to second place.
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                                                                                        • Igor A
                                                                                          I read the title without my eye glasses and thought the title was Dumpling People, Yum! But it not about tasty food at all.
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                                                                                          • Minty
                                                                                            so shallow
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                                                                                            • Joanne R 561977
                                                                                              Money can buy possessions but not love. My daughter is in a relationship with someone that has money, but she is not happy. He thinks buying her things makes everything ok, but it doesn't. We keep telling her to leave, but she wont.
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                                                                                              • Tupulua S
                                                                                                We were born without money, we will die without money, but with love, regardless , if you were rich or poor or in between (money is a greedy mans world)
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                                                                                                • Josephine S 603940
                                                                                                  Maybe it’s not quite about the amount of money but how well they manage their money? Do they have debt etc…that can reflect characteristics in a person that may be unattractive? Just a thought…
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                                                                                                  • Joanne N 391824
                                                                                                    thats not right at all , why should that matter . Myhusband is a quadripelic in a hospital bed in our living room , He cant work and neither can I . I didnt leave him because of a surgery with 4 mistakes that left him in this awful state
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                                                                                                    • Frank N
                                                                                                      There's an old saying about the love of money being the root of all kinds of evil. It is sad, though, when the love of money trumps love of people.
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                                                                                                      • The dog house
                                                                                                        Money has been an issue in most relationships. Often men work and some women stay home and raise the children. Sometimes men feel the woman should work as well. This has been known to cause tension especially if one feels the other contributes more than the other. I have also observed some men go with their partners if they want to buy something. Sad that a woman cannot be given the freedom to chose for herself or go out on her own with the money he choses to give her. Some men are still like this I know of a few and have seen others during my retail career. Some women still put up with this as they feel they have no other choice.
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                                                                                                        • Elizabeth T 396096
                                                                                                          Who cares about the reason. Why would you want to be with someone who does not want to be with you?
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                                                                                                          • JANN R
                                                                                                            I agree with you Doreen this happened to me not so long ago he did not feel the way I did so it ended
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                                                                                                        • Melanie G 87848
                                                                                                          No but then again being with someone with no money because they're a loser or gambled their money away, could be a valid reason to dump them.
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                                                                                                          • SueM2
                                                                                                            I would agree with Grommie, the finance issues will simply be the straw that broke the camel's back!
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                                                                                                            • Grommie
                                                                                                              It won't be just the dough.
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                                                                                                              • lulu
                                                                                                                What happened to love?
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                                                                                                                • Carolyn H 319412
                                                                                                                  When looking for a partner, I try to find someone who is as equal to myself.
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                                                                                                                  • Disie
                                                                                                                    Yes, most definitely. Women or Men, they're just trash
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                                                                                                                    • Julie K 348980
                                                                                                                      Shallow in the extreme.
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                                                                                                                      • BLACK LIVES MATTER
                                                                                                                        Why should this type of behavior surprise anyone? - When has life every been FAIR on this planet when it comes to money matters? (Example: "Have Countries" and "Have Not Countries" still exist on this planet - and do not play well with each other - because of lack money on the part of "Have Not Countries). FYI: I do not consider this type of behavior to be unfair or shallow (and during the early part of my life - males married females strictly for their money - it was called "the poor little rich girl syndrome" in the USA)! Poetic (justice) speaking, this is capitalism at its BEST - working on a PERSONAL level (aka "what goes around comes around")!
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                                                                                                                        • APB
                                                                                                                          Anyone who gets dumped is really fortunate...you made a really stupid choice of partner....lucky escape...
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                                                                                                                          • Linda C
                                                                                                                            It has always been part of the reason. Of course we want security and money is a big part of that but I think these days many women contribute to the financial side of their partnership/marriage. I never parted with a partner for that reason though. It was more they just drove me nuts.
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                                                                                                                            • Rhonda D 522615
                                                                                                                              Very sad commentary. Wealth is in the person, not the wallet.
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                                                                                                                              • Sheree T
                                                                                                                                The term use to be Gold Digger they were only interested in the money. It is a disgusting way to treat someone that way. They obviously didn't love the person. I am a great believer in Karma.
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                                                                                                                                • APB
                                                                                                                                  Sexual equality is an interesting beast isn't it...I know it depends wildly on where you are on the planet...but in western societies various values seem to have been allocated to each sex...and while I like seeing beautiful women is sexy clothes and high heels...these things exert power over men...along with other items that make up a "modern woman"....the woman wants equal pay...to retain the right to keep up this dress code....and to harass men who look at them...men are lucky that most women have got very little idea of how much they can control men and how to take control...equal pay is great..equal dress codes...and equal respect...I can't see the three part plan ever working..can you?
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                                                                                                                                  • Linda C
                                                                                                                                    Equal pay - yes - equal respect -y es - equal dress codes - well I cannot see men wearing womens clothes en masse but they should dress well just the same. What is wrong with that. Just because women dress well does not give the males the right to harass them.
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