People follow different paths in life so they diverge at some stages. This happened to me when I moved town for a job, went to university, had kids. These different life stages I've found that some friends become less relatable or compatible based on your lifestyle, while other relationships strengthen.

As you get older you really do lose friends and it's very sad. Each time I lose a friend I go into a fit of depression. The first friend I lost rang one day to tell me she had bone cancer and 6 weeks later her daughter rang to say she had passed away. While I was very sorry for her family an entire section of my life vanished because our children had grown up together and we had history. I just got settled after that when I read another friends daughter posted on her Facebook page that she had stage 4 lung cancer and only a few weeks later she too had passed away. Another person I had shared a part of my life with. Next it was our very good friends and neighbours re-located to Queensland. So while hubby lost his golfing buddy we lost the couple we visited art galleries, exhibitions and went out with. Our social circle was shrinking. Then another couple that we had lunch with once a month down sized for a sea change and yet another couple retired and went bush. These are our friends and parts of our life going back years, and people you can say "remember when" to. Yes, it is possible to make new friends but there is no before or back when and each time you lose a friend, or at least for me, I lose part of my life and story. So while it's fine to have friends drop in and out of your life it's very sad when you have 40 or 50 years of history with them, and nothing can fill that space or void.

I have lost friends -- through death or other circumstances. It seems harder to make or find friends when you get older.

The older we get the less social we becomes. Having lesser time to make new friend as life gets too serious. True friends stay no matter what.

What I have noticed is that as people get married they tend to have "less" time for friends. Some even term it "being under the thumb" but basically I think that people just go through phases and they need to find their place again in their new life and try to accommodate the new extended family members.

Friends...I guess the M. law applies to friendship as well: if a friendship can go wrong, it will. There are friendships never go wrong. It’s no point to account friends, accounting the blessings of a few good friends, makes life better.

In my 70s still have lots of friends some going back to school day in Sydney & it is important to keep in touch for friendship to continue to flourish.

The problem with getting old is your friends die or get to old to understand new technology. Once we would write letters to each other, it was such a treat to hear from them . Now it’s just a. Quick email and to me it’s not the same

Living in society is awfully expensive, people have kids, people move, some friends are people you might only do certain things with (drinking or whatever you're into), people can change over time or sometimes you hit a point where you have less time for certain behaviours - the older you get the less time and energy you have. Don't overthink it. They are still your allies at the end of the day, wherever they are lol

just move on...its not the end of the world.

same here ,had A LOT OF FRIENDS BUT YOU TEND TO MOVE House, and you loose touch but now as we age we need some friends to talk to and confide in .

I had alot of close friends during my 20's and the older I've gotten I find it's not that I've lost my friends , like myself my friends all have moved or have different journeys to take until we all cross paths at different stages later on in life. I just know my friends are still my friends we just all had different journeys to live and experience but believing in our paths crossing again is why I'm thankful for fb who reconnects me to all my friends from my childhood right UpTo now

I had more friends in my 20's and 30's then, children happen and your life is not your own anymore

I had more friends in my 20s Noe I have a handful and they are truly close and trusted The numbers are no longer important it's the quality

Hell, I'm 75+ and I'm pretty sure that you just out live most of them

I have found that as i got older things changed, i got engaged and dropped some friends, then when we got married and had children, i lost alot of friends. We just grew apart, as we had different lifestyles and interests. But I also gained new friends with the same interests.

I have no friends

True Rebecca but good friends are true diamonds so do not worry too much Cheers

after i left high school i was working at [15] and we used to go to the movies in Bundaberg. i came away to Sydney and had to get new friends. I was looking for a new place to live as others moved away and got put onto a group of Christians and been friends since. I went to USA 1976 and that started a great friendship with [sadly now gone] friends and still friends with their kids/family.. So 1 door closes and another opens. My wife is Filipino and now got stacks of new family/friends there and in Australia

Iam still friends with people from school days but most are in different countries but we do keep in touch. All my friends are basically family too now and we all know each others families as well. I think our priorities change as we get older and so does our friendships.

I don't care if I have friends or not

Most of my friends have fallen off the perch.

Its very true your life changes in different ways

I think I've only ever had a few true friends. I was never popular at school and only in my later years in high school did I get my first friends. We don't talk that often though I think everyone was busy and I don't even live in the same state now. But we did do a catch up and it was as if time hadn't passed even though we hadn't seen each other for 18 or 19 years. It was just the same. I think if people are truly your friends then it should feel like that. Like no time has passed when you see them again. At least it wasn't a boring catch up as every one had lots to say. It was fun. It's natural though, everyone has other things that gain priority and it's normal for you not to waste time wondering what everyone is doing on the weekend. I think I've been so adjusted to being by myself, having friends sometimes is nice but I'm more than fine with my own company or little family unit.

when we were young, we did things as youngsters now we are old, we are wiser and hold back, and of course, some friends do not like that, so they don't call you anymore, and not return your call

I am the opposite, I have more friends now.

Friends WHO ARE FRIENDS OR ARE THEY JUST just people you thought you.knew as friends but Disappeared very quickly when things changed particularly where health is concerned.I have several extremely good friends who have been there through thick and thin including my best friend who’s door is always open the phone is never locked. I am terminally I’ll and also have a rare form of Parkinson’s disease there lies the possible way out for some people you thought we’re friends as they think they may catch the disease. Then again you make friends through the various stages of your life and due to many different things they or you take your leave. School, University, Job decision’s and living situations have you moved did they move or did you just grow apart, Put it down to life’s little experiences. They change like the weather who knows , THE IMPORTANT THINGS ARE THAT YOU REMAIN THAT FRIEND, THAT GOOD FRIEND OR THAT WONDERFUL THING AS A BEST FRIEND,

Many of my long term friends are slip sliding away as you do at end of term but I’m making a lot more new friends…..lol

my best friend is my partner he has stuck by me through all the ups and downs

As you really get older friends die or drift into aged care.It's hard work keeping friends after the 70s pass. As long as you have at least 1 good friend, you're not alone.

Lives change and so do your priorities. Friends come and go within this framework. If you are lucky some friends stay with you for life.

Over the years as you get older you start to see who your true friends are and who aren't.

I think as you get older you realise how precious friendships are, and you find out that some friendships were never worth it at all. True friendships last. It is proof when these true friends stick with you during hard times.

Wait until your 50, some friendships are hard work and the friend has to want to keep in touch. It's so easy these days to keep in touch, in my day it was pen and paper or seeing each other occasionally. I lost a lot of friends because they got married and they moved on and didn't keep in touch. Yes we tend to keep the friends that truely care and they want to be apart of your life and they want you in their lives. There's no secret to it, it just has to be wanted and then it works.

You get a bit more selective as you mature and life has more to it

As you get older things change, you get married , have kids your life revolves around your family. You might travel, move to another state or even country. The friends who you still have are the ones who will always be around. Some are for a reason, some for a season and some for life. I have a lot of wonderful friends who I joined the defence force with we don't see each other very often but when we do it is like time hasn't ,moved on. I am now in my 60's

Friends often change with circumstances. Moving to a new area or country. different hobbies. A few may be kept but see them less for various reasons. I don't think age really comes into it.

My best friend is my wife, that's all I really need.

Are they real friends or just temporary or fake friends. Do some friends use you or pretend to be your friend or friend of convenience & then dump you. Just be careful who you make friends with. Do they have an unselfish motive. Anyone can say that they are your friend, but are they truthful & honest. Be very careful who you invite into your life.

This topic of friendship got me browsing on the internet. I found this poem about 'Little Owl and Big Owl' - A poem about friendship by Brian Oldwolf. Quite like this poem! :-) Big Owl said to the Little Owl “What’s the matter Little Owl, Why won’t you spread your wings and fly into the night, Under the stars, above the woodlands, lit by moonlight? ”Then Little Owl looked up at Big Owl and said,“I can’t do it alone, I’m afraid to fly, I’m scared of the height if I fly up to the sky” Then Big Owl took Little Owl under his wing and said,“Little Owl I will keep you safe, you will never have to be alone,I’ve always protected and watched over you as you have grown, And when you have to be brave, and when you have to be strong, Little Owl you know I’m always by your side because that’s where I belong”The Big Owl said to the Little Owl “What’s the matter Little Owl, Why won’t you spread your wings and fly into the night,Under the stars, above the woodlands, lit by moonlight?” Then Little Owl looked up at Big Owl and said,“I can’t do it alone, I’m afraid to take flight, I’m scared of the dark if I fly into the night”Then Big Owl took Little Owl under his wing and said,“Little Owl I will keep you safe, you will never have to be alone,I’ve always protected and watched over you as you have grown, And when you have to be brave, and when you have to be strong, Little Owl you know I’m always by your side because that’s where I belong”The Big Owl said to the Little Owl “What’s the matter Little Owl, Why won’t you spread your wings and fly into the night,Under the stars, above the woodlands, lit by moonlight?” Then Little Owl looked up at Big Owl and said,“I can’t do it alone, and I’m safe here at rest,I’m scared of the trees if I fly out of my nest”Then Big Owl took Little Owl under his wing and said,“Little Owl I will keep you safe, you will never have to be alone,I’ve always protected and watched over you as you have grown,And when you have to be brave, and when you have to be strong,Little Owl you know I’m always by your side because that’s where I belong” Then little owl looked up at big owl and said,“I can’t do it alone, I’m afraid to fly,But with you by my side I’ll fly up to the sky, With you by my side I’ll fly into the dark,With you by my side I’ll fly to the trees in the park”. Then with Big Owl always in his sight, Little Owl took flight into the night……Edited 04-Nov-21 08:22am

You lose the friendships that you dont need i guess. I can say at 49 I have some of the same friends since grade school and some I met as adults. There are people I'll be friends with for a little while and some I know will be there for life.

I don't have any friends so am not bothered

What does your friends want from you? or what do you want out of having friends? Why do you want friends? Will friendship lead to a relationship. Are you lonely that friends make you feel needed or wanted. I have a number of questions going through my head. What's wrong with enjoying your own company. Do you really need friends? Do you value friendship in a big way. Does friendships make you feel secure. We are all different & see things from different perspectives.

As we grow older we change our values, our beliefs etc and your old friends may no longer be of interest to you because your values clash. You then go in different directions.

I have lost some good friends but the remaining ones are so great to be with

Keeping friendships is great, by going out to dinner or go to parties or go shopping together etc. Go out somewhere as group regularly & enjoy each others company. Interact with each other & have a laugh & do things together. Keep seeing each other as often as possible & have some chats & gossip about the latest trends or what's happening at my place with my family etc. Keep in contact regularly & you will never lose your favourite friends. I guarantee it. It works. A support network.

Yes I have lost a few friends over the years but as you say your true friends are like family and you may not see them much but they are always there to ring and have a chat with I am now 70 but still keep in contact with old school friends and those I used to work with

I think it's normal for that to happen. People move away, some get married and sometimes interests change and people spend more time apart and eventually stop hanging out together. I think we all go through it.

I have two good friends I have known for decades. One I have known for almost 50 years. We may not visit as often but we keep in touch. Things happen in life and as you said sometimes they were not true friends.

wait until you're over 60, you'll wonder where all those people have gone?

I think it is nice to have a small group of friends Rebecca. A strong support network of good friends you like is all you need. You may add more friends down the line when you meet people you really like. You will find more new friends as you get out more to events & places of interests to you. Don't give up searching for new friends Rebecca. You just got to find them & they might also be searching for new friends also. Nobody wants to be lonely, well I hope not. Good hunting Rebecca. Best of Luck.

I think a lot of the young generation use friendship by talking or communicating with lots of people on a telephone or by computer. There is no more meeting people in the flesh, in front of each other. In todays society I think we communicate in a different way to make friendships by using technology as the new tool to communicate with each other. You no longer need to visit people anymore as telephones can do it all for you. You just dial up the friend & hang up when you have had enough.

A true friend would probably stay with you most of your life & support you. Someone you can lean on & trust & will listen to your problems etc. You would have a strong happy connection with them in some way.

I reconnected with my two best school friends who still live in my home town. I text and message them most days..its so nice. I have sadly withdrawn from a very dear friend since Covid- i had always been her closest confidant but something broke inside me during the first lockdown and i couldn't cope with people's terrible secrets- nowdays its just enough to cope with my own family stress. So i have sacrificied a special friendship for my sanity..feels very sad and wrong. I have a small group of close friends and feel very grateful for that.

Maybe you could find new friends Rebecca, through clubs & organizations that you are interested in & you can bond with people who have the same interests as you & have a great time together.

I met a lot of friends at college & hung out together etc. Now everyone has gone their own way or direction since leaving college & I have lost contact with everyone & I think people have moved overseas or to new towns or cities etc. to live and to live new lives.

Friends are unusually temporary at some point in our lives. Unless you have a very strong connection with a small circle of friends which could last over a life time & you meet or communicate a lot with them.

We have busy lives and are happy going about achieving goals or getting educated or busy at work or busy raising a family etc.

This is what Facebook is for, I’ve rekindled old friendships through Facebook.

Because between working and other responsibilities (and perhaps if people move far away) it is really difficult to keep up with people (and this goes for family, too). Aside from that, people change and maybe you found that over time that this was more of a friend of convenience than a friend.

Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate. You lose friendships because you are lucky and stay alive. That's the only way I've lost friendships.But that's not to say I haven't had fair weather friends.

That's happened for me too.

I have a few friends (none of them are biologically related to me) - that reach back for decades. However, I did a lot of relocating in the USA - which will affect budding friendships! In addition, you have different degrees of friendship with people! Furthermore, I have radically changed over the decades - and what I treasure in people has radically changed over the decades!Edited 04-Nov-21 05:01am

Hoping to have some good ones and be good to them

It is normal as the years go by we are all on a different path, such as marriage or move to a different area or country. I did make some really good friends where I was working and we still catch up once a month for coffee.

i think when we get older we lose old friends they grow up get married and become friends with those that are in with their jobs and do not go back to their old friends, because they have grown away from them. It is possible though for people to make new friends in so doing become more independent from the old way and take on their new way of being happy.

I had lost some of my friends after I had my first child during high school which I were sad about losing some of my friends during that time. Than after I graduated from high school and college I had lost all of my friends that time which everybody went in their own paths. Now I am 34 years old and I don't have any friends to talk to or be around .

Yes, very true. Friends move for careers. Then it is harder to remain close.

LAST FOREVER OR DON'T

Yes this has definitely happened to me. I know with me, I have become less jolly than what I used to be. Probably not the most approachable any more. I don't know why it happens. Maybe we get more picky? Maybe distance and just doing 'life' gets in the way of friendships. I know it is something I need to work on. Getting more friends, but it's not exactly a thing you can force. I can't go out there and say 'Be my friend' because that would be weird and desperate. I'm keen to learn some clues too, because I have NO clue LoL.

Changes in relationship status and jobs can affect friendships. At least, that's what I experienced.

Actually friends can stop you from getting ahead in life. They can take up too much of ones time. Its better to have few...then you wont have to listen to their problems and boring day to day stuff. If you basically live for your friends... then id say you have a problem...and cant survive without any. I think you have dependency issues. You are weak minded in my view.Edited 04-Nov-21 00:42am

The daily discussion is becoming like a service now for people with emotion problems. This is not what its supposed to be about. So many immature people around who cant solve their own personal problems. Typically its females!

Friends are not that important. Whats important is how you deal with life. If you can't handle not having lots of friends its because you haven't moved on from the past. You must have alot of time on your hands...to worry about lack of friends. Its normal to have less as you get on in life. You need more than friends. Get a life! If you dont work...then you will be more bored and more bothered by how many friends you have or dont have. When your busy...you would not care as much. Some friends are not real friends...they just use people. So better to have a few good ones than many.

People change and move on. I have found that many of the friends I had in my 20s & 30s are back again (I am 63) lol Its like they never left. I like those friends...you don't live in each other's pockets but you and they are there at the drop of a hat when needed.

My theory is that friends come at different levels...any that survived incredible things....and still kept in touch with you are more or less there for life...the rest are passing friends..shared experience but nothing else...they are still there..but the bond is not really so important....but that is probably a male outlook...I am aware that women can sometimes do headcounts and stock up on new friends if they are low...and I cannot understand that at all..... Edited 04-Nov-21 00:20am

Not this friendship topic again! Yawn. People get old and their friends die...or move away. Get over it! If you kept busy you wouldn't worry so much about friends! The loneliest people in the world are those who cant get over old friends. Keep busy...then you wont have any issues. 30 is still young. You are definitely immature for your age. Go cry about some real problem...i find it hard to have any sympathy for your plight!